involuntarily Cyberpunk

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Reality is exactly what's in front of me. There's a lot of media at my convenience. All of them are attempting to shape my personailiy in very specific ways. I'm being incentinvize to identify as specific things and to be against specific groups. I'm being pushed to consume for abstract reasons. I call it Bloomwood's physics (based on the protagonist of Shopaholic). The idea that our purchases have the power to shift us into different timelines on their own, rather than your own beliefs and actions.

There are a lot of sock puppets sitting in front of cameras now. The insidious thing about the new entertainment industry is I'm not sure how aware some of it's contributors are of their role in the problem. It's better to assume all of them do until proven otherwise. People just want engagement. They want numbers. Numbers are where the money is right now, and it's a little dissapointing. I guess pre-social media professionals always gave me the advice that popularity won't matter as much in your field once you leave school as much as the quality of your connections. Now it seems like the opposite, and finding quality connections on social media has always been hard.

Am I anti-social media? I'm not sure but I am certainly detatched. It's interesting to watch social media attention change people's relationships to their body overtime though. Sometimes you can tell what platforms someone is most active on based on their avatar. It's become surreal to see avatars in the real world. Makes me overly concious of my own. I would like to live in a way independent of platforms dictated by others, coorporations especially. I want their products to be a tool for me and nothing more. I refuse to give them more than that anymore

What about money? Social media has made artist's a living wage, that I can't deny. Am I okay with that for me? I am tired of being hungry but my attempts of compromising myself just don't stick - maybe for the better. I don't have the answers I just know I'm sick of being hungry. I want to feel consistent and safe. Tell me what it's like to feel like prosperity isn't a scarcity, I'd like to know

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