from digital to traditional art

⋆ 𝒻ₑᵦᵣᵤₐᵣᵧ ₂₀ ₂₀₂₅

I made the switch to traditional art last year along a lot of other lifestyle changes. I spent a lot of time learning digital art prior. There was a time I wanted to be a professional digital artist because of artists I saw online. I still appreciate digital art, but I don't enjoy making it.

One reason I didn't really enjoy it is because I lost myself, and my style, to the undo button. I didn't need to commit to a concept or decision and while that freedom can be liberating it also sacrificed a lot of character. When I took art history I realized the mistakes in paintings make better stories. I also felt like it was very hard to separate the internet from my process. This manifested in many ways, but the most prominent was probably the override of inspiration. I think there is such a thing as too much inspiration, where I felt void of authenticity. When feeling like you need to appease social media to find footing in a career it can become a type of pressure to be something or someone you aren't.

I realized once I started doing traditional art is that I also didn't like the sensory experience of drawing on the computer. Hunching over a bright tablet in the dark for hours at a time, drawing and undoing the same line over and over, in hindsight sounds like a form of cyber-medieval torture. Of course I didn't have to do that, I pushed myself into making content instead of art and it become inseparable from the medium for me. I like the sound of pencil against the paper. The metallic smell of graphite. Just physically holding your work is something I've taken for granted.

If you look at my art gallery you'll notice my style has changed a lot since. I think the fact my process no longer has a social aspect has banished the imaginary audience from existence. I am more honest about who I am and what fascinates me. I like to draw cute simple faces because I am fascinated by the phenomenon that the cuter something is the more inhuman it becomes. I also like painting with graphite because it is very unpredictable. I don't really know what a graphite painting is going to come out like. I think it is bold, grungey, and chaotic.

I started my first oil painting today. I've always wanted to be an oil painter but found painting intimidating. It's been a lot of fun. I feel like I haven't liked drawing for years, but now I finally do again.